Stop being so hard on yourself
Stop-being-so-hard-on-yourself-Mental health symbol conceptual design isolated on white background

Are you your own worst critic? I know I am.

While I’m getting better at recognising when I’m being hard on myself and changing my behaviour, I still struggle on a weekly basis.

My inner monologue isn’t as kind as it should be.

On a bad day when I’m faced with a challenge I’ve caught myself thinking, “Why can’t you find a solution quickly?” when I should be telling myself “You’ve got time, you can do this”. I’m in such a rush to get somewhere. Although most of the time I don’t know where somewhere is.

I need to learn to set my own pace. Giving ourselves time to learn lessons and overcome challenges is important. I can’t expect to take big leaps all the time. Sometimes I have to take little steps and nurture myself in the process too. The tricky part, however, is ignoring the world when it is screaming at me to get moving.

I feel the pressure to be positive all the time.

Some days I want to sit with my bowl of chocolate negativity on the couch and think “fuck the world”. But then I feel guilty. I’ve got a good life and I’m doing what I love, I don’t have anything to feel bad about right?

Wrong. While it’s not healthy to stay in a negative space for too long, sometimes I need to let myself feel all sorts of crazy emotions before I can move on. We’ve been told that feeling ‘negative’ emotions can prevent us from becoming our better selves. I believe you need to know yourself to grow, and to do that you need to understand how you feel and why.

I’m not good at celebrating my own success.

I know I shouldn’t feel bad for getting what I’ve worked hard for but sometimes I do. When a friend reaches one of their goals I’m so happy for them. I encourage them to celebrate and enjoy the warm glow success brings. But when it’s my turn I’m lucky if I stop for a second to appreciate the progress I’ve made. In fact, my mind is already focusing on all my other goals. No party for me.

Taking a step back and realising what I’ve achieved is exactly the motivation I need to push towards my next goals. When I don’t do this, I get halfway through my work and wonder why I’m even doing it. Some of us have been told that talking about our achievements is gloating or rubbing it in other people’s faces. But good friends want to celebrate with you and they are happy to cheer you on.

Most of us have been hard on ourselves at some point. Next time you catch yourself doing it, stop! It’s so important that you are kind to yourself. And if you see a friend doing it, tell them. We need to take care of each other too.

Sunday 4 October to Saturday 10 October is Mental Health Awareness week. This week is all about promoting positive mental health and wellbeing, and educating Australians about mental health issues. If you need help, please ask for it.


Featured image from Google.

Hi, I’m Rachel
I support multi-passionate business owners to create aligned, ethical and profitable online businesses.