We’re either told: You CAN have it all or you CAN’T. Apparently, there’s no in between. Like with most things, we tend to think in black and white. So I’m here to rain grey all over your monochrome parade.
You can have it all, just not today.
Last week, I was chatting with one of my favourite people, Celia, about life choices and making sacrifices. We’re both at that stage of our lives where we need to make tough choices like do we start a family or pursue our career? Do we work for ourselves or someone else? Do we travel or pay off the mortgage quicker? The usual 30-something stuff.
And I know we’re not alone.
So many of us are struggling to know what to do next, and I think the reason why is because we think in either-or choices. We believe if we don’t do something right now we never will. So we try to do everything at once and fail. Or make a sacrifice and never re-visit what we left behind. We also have a tendency to look to other people’s lives for clarity and compare our choices to others. The problem with this is you’ll never know what choices and sacrifices that person’s made. What worked for them will probably not work for you either.
We all have the same hours in the day and we have to choose how we spend them.
I for one made some big sacrifices early on. I chose to travel young and save up for a house later. I chose to miss university parties so I could study. I chose to take an initial salary cut so I could live the lifestyle I want. Sure, sometimes I wish I had a big house, nice clothes and uni mates to remember the good old days. But will I have a house, dinner parties and a comfortable salary later on? I’m counting on it. However, my travel days might be few and far between.
We have to forget the idea we can dedicate ourselves to multiple goals, equally, and at the same time.
Just because we can do anything, doesn’t mean we should feel as if we have to do everything. It’s impossible, and so damn tiring. We also need to stop blaming ourselves for not being able to live up to the fake ideals society hands us. No one EVER has it all, at the same time. We’re all stuck making daily choices and sacrifices. Just remember tomorrow is a different day.
What do you think? Do you believe we can have it all? Do you struggle to make choices?
Featured image by Pexels.